Cardi B says she can’t join Bruno Mars on tour this fall because she won’t be ready to leave her infant daughter. “I underestimated this whole mommy thing,” she wrote on Instagram
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“I thought that after giving birth to my daughter that 6 weeks would be enough time for me to recover mentally and physically,” she wrote. “Not only am I just not ready physically, I’m not ready to leave my baby behind since the doctors explained it’s not healthy for her to be on the road.”
See: Kate Middleton’s ‘luxury’ birth cost less than the average U.S. birth
The Bronx-born rapper, whose daughter was born July 10, isn’t the only one who was surprised by the aftermath of childbirth. Many women aren’t prepared, no matter how well they or their families plan for their babies’ arrivals.
New mothers experience fatigue, sleep deprivation, and shifting hormones, said Jacqueline Fawcett, a professor in the nursing department of University of Massachusetts, Boston, who co-authored a 1991 study of almost 100 mothers for the first six months post-pregnancy.
They’re sensitive to leaving the baby in those first few months, even to go to the grocery store, yet they also desire interaction with other adults. They may even suffer from depression after childbirth. “It is quite normal and I think the problem is women don’t realize it’s quite normal,” she said.
The study may be 27 years old, but the findings still stand. Most moms said after six weeks they still didn’t feel they were back to normal, which happened closer to three months. Even still, many new moms have to go back to work because they rely on a dual income household and can’t afford to stay home. The Family and Medical Leave Act of 1993 requires most new mothers receive three months of maternity leave, though it is unpaid.
The financial and logistical challenges of motherhood come as a shock to some new moms, according to a recent report by researchers from Princeton University, Yale University and the National University of Singapore, which looked at British Household Panel Survey and U.S. Census Bureau data.
Many new mothers overestimated how involved in their work they would be in their 30s, at a time most women are having children. That also happens to be the time when most people are making significant strides in their careers. Americans are reluctant to take that time off because they’re afraid of losing their job, one study from financial services firm EY found.
Not only are new mothers suffering from interrupted sleep patterns and potential depression, but it’s now more common for women to delay childbirth well into their 30s and even 40s. Later-in-life pregnancies carry extra risks that could mean longer recovery times, said Miranda Castro, a homeopathic educator and author of “Homeopathy for Pregnancy, Birth and Your Baby’s First Year.”
Women who become pregnant with the help of in-vitro fertilization may experience more intense hormonal fluctuations than women who do not. C-sections can also add an extra burden on new mothers, who may feel long periods of pain and have trouble with daily activities, she said.
“There are a lot of women who think a lot about birth and not the period after,” Castro added. “If it is your first baby, you haven’t gotten a clue where you’re headed.”
Complications in the U.S. are more common than one may think. More than 50,000 American mothers are injured giving birth every year, and 700 died, a recent USA Today investigation found. Many of these injuries could have been prevented with better medical care, it found.
Cardi B isn’t the only new celebrity mom to take a sidestep in her career as the result of childbirth. The French Tennis Federation did not award Serena Williams, a seed earlier this year. Williams, who was ranked No. 1 tennis player in the world when she played in the 2017 Australian Open, was instead ranked No. 453. Why the relegation? Because she had taken time out to give birth, and was then bedridden for six weeks because of serious health issues related to the birth.
Working mothers typically face challenges like this when starting a family and building a career, and may see opportunities shift or disappear entirely as a result of having a child, according to “Women, Work and Family,” an analysis of 2017 research distributed by the National Bureau of Economic Research.
“We treat pregnancy and after as if it is a medical condition and not a normal human condition,” Fawcett said. “We don’t give anyone in the family enough time to adapt to the change in circumstances. It is a huge change.”
Also see: The cost of raising a child in America has soared — it’s a price tag fit for a prince
There are ways to help new moms, who could benefit from having family and friends around to care for the home and occasionally the baby while they rest. Online support groups could help, Fawcett said. If they can afford it, visiting nurses can also help with child care.
Expecting parents should also play the “what if…” game, she added, where they anticipate all of the potential risks and events of raising a child, and come up with plans. “If they do happen, they don’t have a shock or surprise on top of the event,” Castro said.
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Source : MTV
